Send your save the dates 6 to 8 months before the wedding for a local celebration, and 8 to 12 months out for a destination wedding, a holiday weekend, or any date that means most of your guests will be traveling. That is the short version, and for most of the couples I plan for, six to eight months is the number I keep coming back to.
But the real answer has less to do with the calendar and more to do with what you have actually locked in. Across the weddings I have planned, the couples who get the timing right are not the ones who mail earliest. They are the ones who waited until a few specific things were settled, then sent. Here is exactly when to send save the dates, how that shifts by wedding type, and the one mistake I watch for every single time.
Quick answer
Send your save the dates 6 to 8 months before a local wedding, and 8 to 12 months out for a destination wedding, a holiday weekend, or any date where most of your guests will be traveling. Earlier than a year out and the card gets forgotten; under four months out, skip the save the date and send your invitations instead.
The short answer: six to eight months out for most weddings
For a local or regional wedding where most people can drive in, 6 to 8 months is the window I recommend. The Knot lands in the same place, calling six to eight months ahead the ideal save-the-date timeline and nudging toward eight if your wedding is far-flung or falls on a holiday weekend. You will see slightly different floors elsewhere: Zola puts the classic etiquette range at four to six months for a local wedding and eight to twelve for a destination.
So why do I skew earlier than the old four-to-six rule? Two reasons I have watched play out at real weddings. First, calendars fill faster than they used to, and the guests you most want there are often the ones with the busiest spring and fall weekends. Second, hotel room blocks and flight prices reward early movers, so giving people a head start genuinely raises your turnout. Sending at six to eight months is the version of “early” that helps without tipping into “forgotten.”
One thing every source agrees on, and I will repeat it because it saves real heartache: do not order or mail a single card until your date and venue are contractually locked. A signed venue contract is what turns “we are thinking about this date” into a date you can safely put in the mail.
When to send save the dates by wedding type
The six-to-eight-month rule is the baseline. The more travel, coordination, or peak-season competition your guests face, the earlier you move. Here is how I adjust it, with the matching invitation timing so you can see both ends of the runway at once.
| Wedding type | Send save the dates | Then send invitations |
|---|---|---|
| Local or regional (most guests nearby) | 6 to 8 months out | 6 to 8 weeks out |
| Destination within the US | 8 to 12 months out | 8 to 10 weeks out |
| International destination | 10 to 12 months out (closer to a year) | 10 to 12 weeks out |
| Holiday weekend or peak season (June to September) | 9 to 12 months out | 8 weeks out |
| Large guest list (200-plus) | 8 to 10 months out | 8 weeks out |
| Short engagement (under 4 to 6 months) | Skip them, go straight to invitations | 6 to 8 weeks out |
Notice the pattern: the harder it is for guests to say yes, the more lead time you give them. A destination wedding or a Memorial Day weekend asks people to spend money and book time off, so they deserve the extra months. A local Saturday in February does not.
How early is too early, and how late is too late
There are two real bookends, and crossing either one causes problems I have had to clean up.
Too early is anything past roughly a year out for a standard wedding. When a save the date arrives 13 or 14 months ahead, guests cannot act on it yet, so they set it aside, and “aside” usually means gone. You also lose your own flexibility: if your date or venue shifts even slightly, you are now mailing change-the-date cards to everyone, which is awkward and expensive.
Too late is under four months out. At that point a save the date no longer buys guests meaningful lead time, and you are better off skipping it and going straight to invitations. If your whole engagement is shorter than four to six months, combine the steps: one well-timed invitation does the job of both.
Madison’s note
“The save the date you send 14 months out is the one your guests lose in a junk drawer. I had a couple insist on mailing theirs the week they got engaged, more than a year ahead, and by the time invitations went out half the family had no memory of ever getting one. Eight months is the sweet spot: close enough that people act on it, far enough that they can still get the time off.”
— Madison Cole, Certified Wedding Planner
Save the dates and wedding invitations are two different timelines
This trips couples up constantly, so let me draw the line clearly. A save the date is the early heads-up: it announces the date and the city, nothing more, and goes out months ahead. The invitation is the official document, and it lands much closer in, 6 to 8 weeks before the wedding (8 to 12 weeks for a destination so out-of-town guests can finalize travel).
If you want the full breakdown of that second step, including how the RSVP deadline works backward from your caterer count, I walk through it in my guide on when to send wedding invitations. And once you are ready to actually mail them, the rules for names, titles, and envelopes live in how to address wedding invitations.
The simple rule
Save the dates announce the date and the city. Invitations carry the real details: time, full venue address, dress code, and the RSVP deadline. Send save the dates 6 to 8 months out, invitations 6 to 8 weeks out, and set your RSVP deadline 3 to 4 weeks before the wedding so your caterer gets a clean head count.
What I check before my couples hit send
The date on the calendar is only half of it. Before any save the date leaves my couples’ hands, I run through a short list, and skipping any one of these is where I see things go sideways.
- The venue contract is signed. Not verbally held, not “pretty sure,” signed. Everything else hangs off a date you can defend.
- The hotel room block is set up. If you are sending out-of-town guests a date, give them somewhere to book on the same day. A save the date that points people to a live room block converts to actual hotel reservations far better than one that leaves them guessing.
- The guest list is at least 90 percent locked. A save the date is a quiet promise of an invitation, and you cannot take it back. Resolve the plus-one and family-politics questions before you print, then handle any late additions with an invitation only.
- Your wedding website is live. Remember that six-month silence between the save the date and the invitation. A website fills it, and it gives the card somewhere to point. If you have not built one yet, here are the wedding website platforms I recommend.
- You have ordered with a buffer. If you are mailing paper, order three to four weeks before your target send date to leave room for proofing and shipping. Letterpress or foil needs longer.
If you want all of this sitting inside one master plan rather than living in your head, it maps cleanly onto a month-by-month wedding timeline, where the save the date is one of the first real milestones after you book the venue.
Frequently asked questions
Do you have to send save the dates?
No, they are optional. They earn their keep when guests are traveling, when your wedding lands on a holiday weekend, or when your engagement runs longer than six months. For a small, local wedding with a short timeline, a well-timed invitation does the same job on its own.
Can you send save the dates too early?
Yes. Past about a year out, guests stop treating the date as real and the card gets buried before they ever act on it. You also lose flexibility if anything about your date or venue shifts. Unless you have a destination or holiday-weekend wedding, I would not mail save the dates more than 10 to 12 months ahead.
How long after save the dates do invitations go out?
Invitations follow several months later, landing 6 to 8 weeks before the wedding (8 to 12 weeks for a destination). So if you mail save the dates 8 months out, your guests will hear nothing for roughly six months before the invitation arrives. That gap is normal, but it is exactly why I keep a wedding website live in the meantime.
Do you send save the dates to everyone you invite?
Only to people you are certain will be invited. A save the date is a soft commitment, and you cannot quietly drop someone after sending one. Wait until your guest list is at least 90 percent locked before you print. Last-minute additions can receive a formal invitation only, with no save the date at all.
Should save the dates be printed or digital?
Either works, and the timing is the same. Digital save the dates have one quiet advantage: they let you confirm current mailing addresses before invitations go out, which saves you from chasing them later. If you mail paper, order them 3 to 4 weeks before your send date to leave room for proofing and shipping.
Sources
- The Knot — Save-the-Date Etiquette: When to Send Them. theknot.com
- Zola — When to Send Save the Dates. zola.com
- The Emily Post Institute — Wedding Etiquette. emilypost.com
The bottom line
For most couples, mail your save the dates six to eight months out, push to eight to twelve for destination or holiday-weekend weddings, and never before your venue is signed. Get that one piece of timing right and the rest of your stationery runway falls into place. For the full sequence from “just booked the venue” to “walking down the aisle,” work it into your wedding planning checklist so nothing slips.
— Madison Cole, Certified Wedding Planner
